Paris in August

5 Things you should know about Paris in August

1) Ghost city - Paris is a complete ghost city in August as all the Parisians leave the city for the entire month to go on their summer holidays in the countryside. Everything is closed and there are no French people around....It is not unusual for the Boulangeries (who needs bread anyway?), restaurants, bars, hair dressers etc to be closed for 4 weeks whilst the owners are lounging around in the sunshine somewhere...

2) Tourist central - To make up for the complete lack of Parisians, the city is covered in tourists and you begin to forget that you are in France, as the national language becomes English for the month.

3) Sleazing season - As I've told you all before, Paris isn't the nicest city for a single girl, unless you are permanently in the company of others, because if you are alone and female you are often harrassed....but August is a joke - it's peak sleazing season! For example, last Friday after finishing work late I caught a taxi home. My taxi driver kept insisting on taking me for a coffee before dropping me home. I told him about 35 times that I didn't want a bloody coffee, I only wanted to GO HOME, and that this was actually a simple request and the definition of his job was to respond to such requests and take people to the destination of their choice (that being my home). In the end, he finally agreed to take me home, and after I refused to give him my number, he wouldn't let me get out of the taxi before giving me his number - as if I'm ever going to call you Jean-Louis - you bloody Psycho! And the very next day I had 3 guys walk past me in the street and stop to tell me I had beautiful eyes - now I know my eyes are stunning ;) but come on!

4) Crappy weather - I am one to accept, even expect, crappy weather in August when I'm in Sydney and it is in fact Winter, but when in Paris, where it is summer, this is frankly unacceptable. Last August it rained for 24 days, and this August the skies are competing to try and break this record. An umbrella shouldn't be a necessity in the middle of summer!

5) Festivals galore - August is the month of festivals and activities in Paris, to give those of us who stay around something to do, and all the tourists something to smile about (given that the restaurants and boulangeries are closed). This year the Quartier d'été festival had an Australian theme and there were nights of Australian cinema, music and didgeridoo playing - unfortunately this happened to co-incide with my only week of holidays and so I missed it all, but I'm sure it would have been good. There are also of course a few open-air cinemas (all of which are fabulous in the month of constant RAIN!) and then who could forget to mention the magnificent Paris Plage! That's right - an artificial beach in Paris for August - what a fabulous idea! The only problem with this little brain wave is that someone forgot to tell the Parisians that a beach actually consists of sand, the ocean, waves, and hopefully swimming. Apparently they define a beach by the presence of long deck chairs, the possibility of stripping down to your bikini, and a body of water of some sort (that being the Seine river). Now just because its called a beach, don't get any crazy ideas and try jumping into the Seine to go swimming - you'd die from all the pollution!

All I can say is BRING ON SEPTEMBER!